Day 5 of the plant-based diet

I think I can confidently say that I was 99.5% vegan today (by diet, not ethics).

This morning I woke up at 4:30 and had my coffee with maybe a tablespoon of half & half before I went on a run. That tablespoon was what took that 0.5% away from my attaining vegan status today. I’m scientifically basing that on the volume of things that went into my mouth today.

For breakfast, I murdered, chopped up and ate an apple and a pear. They screamed, but they tasted so good.

For lunch, I had leftover 3-bean chili.

For a snack, I had a fist full of pistachios. Then a bag of Terra Chips and a bag of animal crackers. I had to check the internet to see if animal crackers are vegan-friendly. Here’s what I learned:

While Nabisco’s recipe is free of animal ingredients, Cole & Stewart’s sociological analysis would suggest that consuming animal crackers is ritualistically anti-vegan, as it socializes speciesist sentiments and human supremacy in children.

Whatever. I bit all of their heads off first so they’d feel no pain.

For dinner, I had leftover lentil loaf, rice, and a kale and spinach salad with a balsamic, avocado and cilantro dressing. “Lentil loaf” and many other healthy, vegetarian and vegan foodstuffs just sound gross. “Nutritional yeast” and “liquid aminos?” I mean, come on. Those both sound like annoying but treatable diagnoses you’d hear from a gynecologist. They should call them “Cheesy Poof Powder” and “Really Just Like Soy Sauce,” respectively.

And I can’t, for the life of me, remember where I read it, or maybe it just came into my own head, but I’m going (try to) start abiding by the “Fast Starts at 8.” No food after 8 p.m. to promote healthy digestion.

I need to remember to drink more water, too. I drink a lot of water in the morning, but once I get to work, I forget and I drink a bunch of green tea instead.

I’m usually in zombie robot mode at 4:30 a.m., but I’m going to try my damnedest to forgo the half & half tomorrow and just take my coffee black, or maybe try it with almond milk.

I’m not wholeheartedly attempting to go vegan (but never say never), however, I am really getting onboard with this plant-based experiment in which Elise and I have endeavored. I sincerely don’t miss or crave meat or dairy. I did, however, make quesadillas for the girls for dinner tonight, and the cheese grease that pooled in the cast iron skillet sure did smell heavenly!

It could just be dumb luck but I have noticed, and have been anxiously anticipating, that my muscles and joints aren’t inflamed as they have been for as long as I can remember. Between us, as much as I’ve loved running for the past 5 years, this past year has literally been a pain. In recent months I’ve had to convince myself to go on runs because I feel like it has become my identity and I’m obligated to go out.

I’m shooting for 100% vegan tomorrow and I’ll just take it day-by-day and see how this experiment continues to play out.

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