Janicek.com

Do you ever get those annoying messages on your answering machine?

“Hi, this is Bobby. We have your tickets to Las Vegas ready and waiting. Call me directly at 1-877-123-3245 before 10 p.m. with confirmation code #49235 to claim your tickets.” pthththbbbhtht. Stupid money sucking time share.

Scam right? I would hope most people would know to just delete those messages. Living in an apartment, you’re cursed with receiving those phone calls for the rest of your apartment dwelling life. Some stupid, prior resident who had the same phone number thought that she would actually win the Land Cruiser that was parked in the middle of the mall. She put her phone number and address on the little slip and dropped it in the box. Not only did she involuntarily [because she didn’t bother to read the back of the card with a magnifying glass] change her long distance phone provider, but she sold her soul to the marketing devil. I’ve accepted that. I don’t answer phone calls that show up as ‘unavailable’ on caller ID. I hate unsolicited advertising, but what can you do about it?

I used to have fun with telemarketers. In our automated society, you don’t even get to talk to a human telemarketer anymore – you get a recording. Even the sales industry is getting lazy. It’s not even worth it to answer the phone. Every time I decide to answer an ‘unavailable’ call, I always hear that infamous “click”, then the phone goes dead. Call me a conspiracy theorist, but I assume that that click is to log a valid phone number so I can be subject to more solicitation.

I went home for lunch yesterday and the answering machine was blinking. Nobody calls us during the day because all of our friends and relatives know that we have daytime jobs. I knew what I was going to hear when I hit play.

I was actually pretty surprised at what I heard after I listened to the pitch the whole way through. It was some sincere guy speaking on behalf of a particular credit counseling bureau. It wasn’t personalized. It was a recording. I thought to myself: “Wow, that’s really sad. Statistics must show that a credit counseling company can randomly call people and leave messages offering their services to help consumers get out of debt.” I thought about calling the company and saying: “Hey morons, guess what… we’re not slaves – we don’t have a single credit card.” There wouldn’t be any point to doing that. Maybe our phone number was once owned by someone else who had some financial difficulties and was flagged by creditors, hence this annoying message.

I think that it’s safe for the companies to call every American and offer their get out of debt scam. There’s more people than I would like to imagine that are stuck with credit card debt. Thinking about it just leaves a bad taste in my mouth. Look at all of the TV ads and the online pop up ads. “Get Out of Debt for FREE!!!” We’ve all seen them. What’s really sad is that a lot of people that I know make a lot more money than I do – but I bring home more. I put more into savings. It’s not a whole lot that I can put back, but at least I find comfort in doing what little I can. I save money on ink. I don’t have to write three separate checks a month to Visa, Mastercard and Discover. Woooo… Dillard’s is having a SALE this weekend, I’m whipping out the Gold Card. After paying interest on a shirt and a belt, you might as well have paid full retail. I’ll take my fist full of dead presidents to Walmart or the Salvation Army and avoid the blinded consumer mass.

Anyway, we have debts. Luckily our two debts are considered “good” debts. Regardless, I don’t like being in any kind of debt. Credit cards are the worst. “But you need a credit card to rent a car or make airline or hotel reservations.” Wrong. If a company won’t take my debit card, then they lost a good cash paying customer. Case in point: When Elise and I went to rent the Harley Davidson a couple weekends ago, they needed a $3000 credit card authorization. This was for insurance purposes. I forgot what option I chose – I think it was the best since I already have my own motorcycle insurance. If I were to damage the bike, my insurance would cover it. I wouldn’t have to pay $3000. I handed ol’ Keith my debit card. My debit card wouldn’t ‘authorize’ $3000. That’s because there’s not a credit limit associated with a debit card. I was fully prepared to either 1) hop behind Keith’s computer, pull up my online bank statement and show him that I had cash available, or 2) say thank you and leave. I told Keith that I only use a debit card. He appreciated my confidence and did an old timey print of my debit card and handed over the keys.

I think credit is a contemporary [and permanent] aspect of life. We’ll eventually have a mortgage. We’ve planned on incurring another car loan. But that’s it. Those are the ones that are considered ‘good’ debts. In our mid term financial calendar, we don’t foresee any other new debts. Unless, of course, we win the lottery. HA! I don’t even want to touch on that. Mr. Ramsey calls the lottery the tax on the poor. We have a really good friend who swears that one day, he will win the lottery. He plays every week. I bite my lip and say: “When you do, would you mind buying me a new motorcycle?” Like clockwork, he retorts: “Sure… how many?… what color?”

I’m glad it’s a short week this week. We’re taking the trusty Shadow into Austin for brake repairs on Saturday morning. Spherion is having a company party in Georgetown. Elise works for a temp agency that is under contract with Spherion. I think it will be fun. I’ll get to meet all of El’s girlfriends from work. I’ve heard enough about them that I feel as if I already know them. It’s always interesting to meet people that you’ve already painted a mental picture of without actually having seen them face to face.

We had our monthly Marketing Communications staff meeting today. I forgot how all of this came about, but there were three of us who started laughing uncontrollably at a very inopportune time. I hate it when that happens, but at the same time, I love it. It wasn’t really a ‘formal’ meeting, but it was still kind of rude for us to be laughing. We were all trying so hard to hide our faces. One of us would eventually emit a little chuckle through the nose and the laughing would start over again. It was great fun. It reminded me of being a carefree kid again.

That reminds me of a time back in the 10th grade. Johnny and I had our English class together. Our teacher was also our Theatre Arts teacher. She was a great lady and an awesome teacher. Unfortunately for us, she had a relatively large mole on her chin. Our classroom was setup in a theatre in the round formation. Johnny and I had been separated early in the year for obvious reasons. We were seated on opposite sides of the classroom, facing each other. One of us would always take a small, circular piece of paper, color it in with a black pen, moisten it and attach it to one of our chins. The other would eventually take notice of this tomfoolery, turn beet red, hold his breath and nearly die of internal laughter. That was great. I really miss stuff like that.

This past weekend was pretty laid back and relatively uneventful for your humble narrator.

On Friday, I rushed home to play on the PS2. I put a big dent in SSX Tricky – unlocking levels and adding tricks to my trick book repertoire. I was really tired from having stayed up late on Thursday, so I went to be pretty early.

I slept until 9 a.m. on Saturday. I got up, charged the Hitachicam’s battery, hopped in the shower, dressed and headed to the post office. I had to mail the Radeon 7000. I’ve become quite the master at transporting awkward objects on my motorcycle. I’m waiting for the day to be pulled over by a cop and hear the words: “Young man, you know it’s not very safe to carry a white tail buck carcass, a mini refrigerator and a domestic cat on this motorcycle.” Hey… there’s an idea, I ought to train Riley to ride the motorcycle with me. I could take him to the Farmer’s Market on Saturdays and charge people to watch him eat Jell-O and green beans. He also likes beer. Bud Light. He doesn’t really like Miller Light, but he’ll drink it if that’s all we have.

Anyway, after mailing off the graphics card, it was off to the Temple Party Drags – emphasis on the Drag. It cost $45 for a weekend pass. They didn’t offer day passes. Luckily I stopped at the bank on the way and pulled $40. The lady dispensing wristbands spotted me the extra $5.

I rode around the ‘campgrounds’ for a while and found a little secluded space to park. I walked around for a bit and checked out the patrons’ motorcycles. After walking around for half an hour or so, I went and sat in the stands to watch the qualifying races. Mullets, do-rags, home-job tattoos and beer drinkers at 10 a.m. The races were fun to watch, but the people watching wasn’t as fun as I had expected. Nothing like the smell of nitrous oxide and burning rubber to start off a Saturday.

Before it got too hot [and because I had no cash], I headed home for some lunch in the air conditioned apartment and some more SSX Tricky. I was told by Temple Party Drags officials that if I got my wristband cut before 7 p.m. on Saturday, I would get a $20 refund. I checked the event itinerary and saw that there was a bikini contest and live music later in the evening.

I headed back to the raceway at 5:30 p.m. I parked in the same spot and made the same rounds. Nothing had changed. There were a few more people, but nothing was going on that was worth my $40. I really didn’t feel like watching bikini girls strut around to Skynyrd cover songs. I left along side many other bikers at 6:30. We all wanted our $20 refund. I figure the actual $20 that I spent was somewhat worth it. It’s good to know that once a year there is a motorcycle event here in bustling Temple. I made my contribution. I guess it would have been more fun if I had some company. Elise was in Minneapolis.

I went by the local Mom and Pop video store and picked up Orange County. I came home, watched that and then “beat” SSX Tricky. I guess you really can’t beat that game, I just unlocked all of the levels and most of the snowboards.

I slept in until around 10 a.m. on Sunday. It was such a great feeling, waking up on Sunday and knowing that I didn’t have to worry about going to work the next day. I don’t think I did anything on Sunday. I went to the store and bought the paper. That was pretty much it. I sat around all day and did nothing. That felt great. Riley and I channel surfed and played with his string toy.

Monday – I pretty much did nothing again. I took a good long walk in the late morning. It was really hot and humid. I guess that’s why I didn’t do much that past two days… it’s just too hot outside. I did cook a really good t-bone that my parents gave me. That was my lonesome Labor Day barbeque – me, the cat and 98 channels. I caught the Red Hot Chili Peppers Backyard BBQ on VH1. I don’t know the specifics, but some girl won a contest and the RHCP performed a private concert at her apartment’s pool.

The Abyss came on at 10 p.m. I forget what channel it was on, but there was no commercials (we have ‘basic plus’ cable – no premium channels). I don’t think I’ve ever seen that movie in its entirety. Good movie. I think I was trying to stay up until Elise got back. She flew from Minneapolis to Dallas and had to drive back to bustling Temple. Her plane didn’t get in until 12 a.m. The drive from Dallas is 2+ hours. I lasted until around 1:30 and had to fall asleep.

I heard the water in the sink running at around 2:30 p.m. I pried my eyes open just as El was coming to bed. She laid her head on my shoulder and I scratched her head. Seems like only moments of sleep-time had passed when both of our alarms were screaming.

El got up and took a shower. I slept until the very last affordable minute. We both roamed around the apartment in our own pathetic ways, bumping into each other with zombie eyes, attempting to start the work week.

Tonight we can pretend like she’s just gotten back. She will tell me all about her exciting weekend in Minneapolis with her friends and I will tell her how Riley and I caught a fuzzy insect in the fireplace.

Talk about starting off a three day weekend on the right foot. I got this email from my Mom late this afternoon:

Date: Fri, 30 Aug 2002 15:47:15 -0500
To: “Josh Janicek”
Did I ever tell you I love you? Well, I’m telling you now. Each day I/we check out your web page, I am either laughing or getting a warm, fuzzy, good feeling and so glad to have you as my son. You have a way of touching people and that’s a good thing. I hope you keep it up and improve on it even more in the future. You are my wonderful son!

By the way, since you will be “out” most of the day Saturday, you should use sun screen and also take a hat to protect you scalp. Your dad and I are paying the price these days for not using hats.

Have fun…

I love my parents.

Sometimes I kill me. I just called our apartment complex leasing office to put in a work order…

Angel: “Good morning, Bridge Apartments, this is Angel, how can I help you?”

Josh: “Hi Angel, this is Josh Janicek in 1326 – my wife said that there was a real bad smell coming from the bathroom.”

I paused after I realized what I had just said.

Angel: “Ooooookay”

Josh: “Yeah, something really stinks in the vanity – seems like it’s coming from the air conditioning vent.”

Anyway – I thought that was funny. Okay, I’m retarded.

On another note… You want to know what my favorite thing in the whole wide world is? Riding my motorcycle first thing in the morning. Even if I know I’m going to work [don’t get me wrong… I love where I work… I love the people I work with… I work at the best place in the whole world…], I take that ten minute ride and cherish it. Cool summer mornings, fresh air, birds chirping, the smell of grass (and the smell of Vap-o-Rub emanating from the 20′ Buick in front of me, driven by ol’ buns ‘n’ knuckles on her way to the Golden Corral). Nothing beats it. It’s quiet, it’s peaceful, it’s a good time to meditate.

I’ve decided that when we retire, I want to move to a warm coastal city. I don’t care if it’s in California, Florida, Hawaii, Australia… wherever. I want to wake up first thing in the morning, everyday, and ride my motorcycle. I’ll ride it along the coast and yell at seagulls. I’ll take deep breaths and be thankful that I’m alive. I will stop at some deli or cafe and eat a piece of fruit on the patio. I will get there around the same time everyday. All of the other regulars will hear me coming from miles away and say, here comes Ol’ Josh and that motorcycle. I’ll wear canvas shorts and a t-shirt. I will ride home and sing songs to myself. I will wake Elise up and make her breakfast. We will play golf. I will get mad because I will probably never become good at golf and Elise will tell me that she loves me anyway.

Our children will come to visit us multiple times a year. My sons and I will take long coastal rides and I will show them where I had my adventures that are yet to happen…

That will be nice.

Aye aye aye… mis ojos rojos. I stayed up until 1:30 this a.m. playing Twisted Metal Black and SSX Tricky. Usually I go to bed around 11 p.m…. I DID NOT want to get out of bed this morning.

Elise scooped me up around six and we went to HEB to return some waffle syrup (got a whopping $1.15 back) and then we were off to Walmart to get the PS2. I was like me (aka a kid) in a candy store. We picked up the Playstation and TMB and made it home just in time for Elise to watch Friends. I took my time running the wires behind the entertainment center and pretended like I was reading the owner’s manual – just waiting for 7:30 (Friends over).

7:30 p.m. – 1:30 a.m. – mostly SSX Tricky. Six hours of thumb numbing gaming. I’m to the point where I can almost say I think I know what I’m doing, but still suck. Badly. Must practice. Must spend many, many more hours in front of TV. Good ol’ John was supposed to send me a memory card so I could save games and character profiles… guess I’ll have to swing by Walmart on the way home from work.

Elise is leaving for Minnesota today to spend the long weekend with friends. I will be reclusive all weekend and engaged in virtual snowboarding and vehicular mayhem. I am going to peel my butt off the couch for most of Saturday to attend the 24th annual Temple Party Drags – no, not cross-dressers on scooters. Super-charged, nitrous-boosted Harley Davidsons. I think I’ll take the 8mm Hitachicam to film some of the action. Maybe I’ll produce a good video and send it to whoever organizes this event and the website and get a little publicity.

In other news… I lied, I didn’t play the PS2 for six straight hours. I flipped the channel over to MTV last night to catch part of the Video Music Awards for five minutes or so. Stupid. I must be getting old. The Hives?… I mean, come on! I did make note that I’m really glad that there wasn’t an abundance of ‘rock’ bands accompanied by scratchin’ DJs. Why does MTV have VMAs? MTV doesn’t play videos. Shouldn’t they have The Real World Awards? Or the I’m a White Gangsta Wannabe High School Student – Watch Me Grope this 17-year-old Girl’s Leg in the Club and Go Home and Cry About It Awards? Eminem did win a few awards from what I gathered on the news. I did see him accept one of his awards – he was bood. Good. Now he’ll be more pissed off next year, make an even better album and make it a point to offend even more.

Wow – that was cool. I just paid a bill online. Actually, I made my first monthly bike payment to the credit union. See, I borrowed against my own cash so that basically became a new ‘account’. This account now shows up on my online statement and I can transfer money to that account.

I went to the bank during my lunch break to make sure I could pay that way. Unfortunately, the customer care representative (really small bank). was busy processing a loan for some guy trying to get a mobile home. I didn’t feel like waiting around for that. So, I just tried paying my bill online – it worked. I think next week I’ll just go to the bank and have them automatically deduct the money from my checking account and put it into the loan account on the first of each month.

I’ve thought about paying all of our bills online, but that would cost us more than what it’s worth. We don’t have that many bills, so paying x amount of dollars per month for the service would be more than the price of stamps. “But you could have your bills paid automatically”…. I get my bill in the mail, I sit down at my desk, write the check, lick the envelope, walk back to the mailbox – all automatically.

In other news… I didn’t get to eat lunch until 2:45 today. I got to work, started working [duh], had an hour phone call with a salesman about a service we’re going to start using, turned around in my chair to find my boss standing there. I had an impromptu meeting with her, came back to my desk to find an email saying that I needed to be in conference call at 1:00. Went to said meeting in the main building and had to come back to our building for our standard Thursday, 2:00 meeting. The funny part was watching myself in the last meeting lean back and forth in my chair to make it squeak and muffle the sound of my stomach growling. Another day whizzed by. Guess that’s good.

Nothing new today. I received Medal of Honor: Frontline in the mail this afternoon. I’ll either buy Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater 3 or Twisted Metal Black with the PS2.

I was pretty busy at work today so the day just flew by. Came home to my slow graphics processing computer. Luckily I got an email this evening that said my 64mb card will be in the mail tomorrow. If I get the PS2 tomorrow, I’m sure that’ll hold me off for a few days until the graphics card arrives.

Elise is making dinner tonight. She’s been working some mad overtime – making up hours for her half day on Friday (leaving for Minneapolis) and making up for the haircut she got last week. Anyway – so she’s making dinner – we both need to start eating from Elise’s cookbook. My cookbook isn’t as healthy.

My 32mb ATI AIW128 graphics, TV and video card sold for $152.50! It was at $96 for most of the day and I was happy with that. In the last 30 seconds, there must have been some hawk eye bidding. $152.50 is well over what I was expecting.

So, having received that extra money, I decided to buy another graphics card. I don’t like the PNY Verto 32mb PCI card that I bought last Thursday. My review of this card: Bad. I never really thought that a graphics card could make your computer seem sluggish. Obviously it can. Websites with any graphics load slow, working in Photoshop is like painting with my toes, scrolling through pages is choppy and trying to type is a joke. I’m going to take it back to Circuit City this weekend.

Anyway, I bought a Chaintech 64mb NVIDIA GeForce2 MX400 PCI graphics card last night on eBay for $59.95. I’m sure my computer feels like a brothel right about now – four graphics cards in two weeks.

In other news: I talked to both Moms last night. Joanne called early in the evening. She told me about a recent interview she had with someone from BLT Research regarding crop circles. I think she’s pretty versed in how crop circles are allegedly created. A plasma (think lightening) vortex is sent to earth to create the intricate patterns. She also told me how pure lead has been found in and around crop circles and that (I think) makes for more fertile adult crops.

I called my Mom around 9 p.m., just before I won the GeForce2 card. I was calling to ask what kind of 64mb card she had. We had a nice long chat. I was instructed to purchase any pharmaceuticals from Canada. We don’t really take medicines other than vitamins, but it looks like the Canadians have good deals on drugs.

I just noticed that I have really hairy fingers. Well, I didn’t really just notice, but my attention was brought to it because I singed the hair on the fourth middle phalanx on my right hand when I was cooking fajitas yesterday. It looks quite funny. It looks as if I’m trying to perpetrate a phalange comb-over. Most of the hair on this segment of my finger is almost completely gone, but there are still long (almost an inch) hairs on the side that escaped the flames.

What do we need finger hair for anyway? I don’t think it keeps me any warmer during the winter months. Maybe I should conduct a test. This February, when it gets really cold, I’ll shave my fingers and see if I get any colder than I have in the past. I would need a constant though. I know, I’ll shave the finger hair on my left hand and leave the finger hair on my right. If the fingers on my left hand do, in fact, become more subject to frigid air, I will need to wear a red glove and conclude that finger hair does keep the phalanges insulated.

While deep in this research, I think I will simultaneously conduct my ‘Is it Necessary to Dress Up for my Job’ experiment. I will ride to work with my boxer shorts on the outside of my pants while wearing only one red glove to protect the hairless fingers on my left hand. I’m sure the residents of bustling Temple will find my appearance at traffic lights amusing as I’m prone to singing to myself (motorcycle = no radio). From the comfort of the observers’ vehicle they will find me with my boxer shorts and pants interchanged, a red glove on my left hand and bobbing my head as I sing quietly to myself.

Once again, another weekend that was just not long enough. I came home later than usual on Friday. Elise and I went on our Friday night pizza date [see red bouncy ball in previous story]. We both went to bed pretty early.

We left around 5 p.m. on Saturday to go to Dallas for Jenni’s birthday party. Surprisingly, we were the first ones to arrive. Sandy [Jenni’s mom] cooked spaghetti with meatballs and sausage. Elise and I were quick to wolf down Sandy’s homemade sauce with bowtie pasta (I guess that wouldn’t make it spaghetti, but that’s what Sandy calls it, so that’s what we called it).

After dinner, I went outside to hang out with the men and guard the keg. Dave [Jenni’s dad] and Anthony [host of party] were the only other guys present. We sat outside and talked about work, the economy, the job market, stocks, etc. You know, boring adult stuff. I think it’s funny that I can be engaged in adult-speak and simultaneously step outside of myself to listen in. “Look, there I am, nodding my head, hand in pocket whilst blabbing about politics and money. You know, it would be a lot more fun to talk about X-men, professional skateboarding and those cool, high powered Nerf guns.”

Not that I’m complaining about the company. I guess I’m just documenting my realization that once you’re finished with college and enter the real ‘adult’ world, your waistband expands and you talk about boring stuff. Maybe I should volunteer at the YMCA, become a Big Brother or some equivalent so I can have honest, to-the-point conversations.

Anyway, the sun went down, the music got louder, more and more people arrived, the keg became lighter, there was some dancing, there was some wrestling, there were some incriminating stories told. Luckily El and I were the the out-of-towners, so we weren’t subject to much ridicule. I did find out why a certain attendee was dubbed “Twinkle Toes”.

Elise and I left a little shy of 2 a.m. I’m sure the ride was long and boring. I wouldn’t know because I slept the whole way. I feel kind of bad for Elise. I should have stayed awake and kept her company.

I slept until 10 a.m. on Sunday. I had the additional two hours to sleep in the car, so I let Elise sleep even longer. I prepped and cooked fajitas for lunch. I read my new Playstation magazine and Elise watched TV.

John came over around 3 p.m. We talked about this, that and the other. We went to IHOP for dinner. John got mad because the older lady in the booth behind us (and in clear view from where he was sitting) kept spitting her food out into her spoon.

John left for Ft. Worth and El and I went home. I checked my eBay auctions. Everything is going to sell. We watched Jumanji and went to bed.

I just put some more stuff on eBay. Getting rid of these kind of hurts. I’m selling my DOD Death Metal FX86 guitar pedal and my VOX Wah-Wah. Makes me want to cry (he he). But really, I used the hell out of those pedals back in the day. I would still used them if my amp worked. I told Elise that I’m going to sell these pedals, but one day I’m going to want to get another amp, so I’ll probably have to buy more pedals. This probably won’t be until we get a house and half of the garage is my mechanic shop/one man band rehearsal studio.

I got in trouble this morning for not passing along an e-vite. Let me first say: Don’t send me e-vites. I won’t read them. I don’t know what e-vite’s ‘privacy policy’ is and I don’t care. I don’t want my email address floating around. I’ve received two e-vites in the past month and now I’m just waiting for the spam to start flowing in. I don’t care how web savvy you think you are, just send me an email and say: “Hey Josh, I’m having a party”. Or better yet, use the phone. Send me an e-vite and I’ll use your email address to subscribe to every porn and ‘get out of debt free’ newsletter I can find.

Anyway, our friend Jenni is having a birthday party in Dallas tonight. I was sent an e-vite for this party. I didn’t read the e-vite. Jenni called today and asked if we received the invitation. Elise said no. Jenni said that the e-vite was sent to me. So then I had to explain why Elise didn’t know about the e-vite. We already knew about the party before the online invitation.

We went to Mazzio’s last night and split a pepperoni pizza. A little girl was playing with a red rubber bouncy ball. Elise was just sitting there talking to me when I saw, out of the corner of my eye, this little ball bouncing around the restaurant and this little girl chasing it. The ball landed right in El’s lap. She didn’t see it coming – I did. It was funny. I guess you had to have been there.

We went grocery shopping after that. I think we’re finally learning how to grocery shop. We spend a lot of money, but we only have to go every three weeks now. We came home to a full parking lot at our apartment complex. Our parking lot has never been full. Some guy moved in downstairs and across the hall. I think he was having a party. He pissed off the neighbors above him.

Elise fell asleep on the couch while I watched Slamball on ESPN. At first I thought to myself “Geez…. this is so stupid”. Then I actually started watching it. It looks like a lot of fun. It’s like arena football, hockey and basketball – but with trampolines! I’d like to play Slamball. I forgot who won – I didn’t care, it was just cool watching guys jump ten feet into the air and collide with one another.

I’m not too impressed with my PNY Verto 32mb PCI graphics card. My computer seems sluggish when pages are loading, when I’m typing and while using Photoshop. When I minimize Photoshop and then maximize it again, all of my images are stacked on top of each other. In the past, when I would type, the curser would keep up with me. Uggghhh. I don’t even want to think about editing video! Guess I’ll have to wait a while and look into selling this one and moving on to a 64mb card.

This has been a very, very long and bad week. It’s been a bad week at work. It’s been a stressful week at work. Not that I’m saying anything negative about where I work. I love where I work… I love the people I work with… I work at the best place in the whole world…

I received my 32mb ATI Radeon 7000 AGP graphic card yesterday. Ugggggghhhhhhhh! I spent four hours trying to get that stupid thing installed. My computer wouldn’t recognize the AGP card. I have an Intel AGP motherboard, but it still wouldn’t work. I downloaded and installed the Intel Chipset Software Installation Utility – that didn’t work either. My Mom has AGP graphic cards on both of her machines, so I decided to call her after my first two hours of cussing and screaming. The both of us couldn’t figure it out with our heads together – and between us both, I’d say we’re pretty damn hardware savvy. I tried the forums. I reinstalled the old ATI All-in-Wonder 128 and its drivers, then uninstalled. It became a vicious circle. Either a blue checkered pattern screen, or no video output at all. I cussed some more. I even started pulling jumpers on my motherboard [according to the manufacturer’s diagram, of course].

I gave up. My Mom suggested pulling Elise’s graphic card and installing it on my machine, then deleting all ATI drivers. Good idea, thought me. I opened the hood of Elise’s machine to find out that her card is on an ISA bus. Pthbbhtthbhhttthh. I really gave up then.

I decided I don’t need an AGP graphic card. I haven’t been too impressed with ATI’s cards anyway. I bought the All-in-Wonder 128 a couple years back for it’s video capture features. It captures great, but it will only save your captured video with proprietary ATI VCR1 or VCR2 codec. It will also allow you to save an MPEG-2, but I prefer AVI as this format has limitations on file size. In order to generate a raw AVI, you have to pull the VCR encoded video into third party software and decompress it. Hardly worth the effort and hard drive consumption. On a plus side, the ATI AIW128 does have a composite and S-video output and coaxial input. I used to watch television on my computer (resizable display) and record Friends for Elise.

Enter the Pinnacle DC30. Those were the cards we used at Vidbook. Good video capture card. Far from the latest technology, but I don’t need the latest and greatest. The DC30 does what I need it to do. I’d eventually like to get a DV camcorder and use Firewire. That will be further down the road.

Anyway – I’m eBayed out for the week so I’m biting the bullet and going to Circuit City after work. I’m eyeing the PNY Verto 32MB PCI card. “But Josh, why are you settling for a 32mb graphic card when you could have the 1024mb Super AGP N2O Sonic Screaming Mega Rhino Blaster Eye Popper 9000 for only $899.99?” Because I don’t need it. I don’t want one. I don’t play games on my computer. I’m getting a PS2 next week anyway!

Well… Elise pretty much covered the happenings of this past weekend. I guess it’s time for your humble narrator to tell you about the scooter. Let me first tell you that the ride to work on the trusty Shadow was very odd on Monday morning. I felt like a giant riding atop a girl’s Schwinn bicycle. I don’t know how else to explain it. The 500 + pounds seemed particularly light underneath me. I noticed that the grips are set low and far apart which is probably why my lower back hurts after riding more than 60 miles at a time.

Riding the Heritage Softail was like driving a tank compared to my bike. The second I sat on it, I could tell it was rugged. The ride was so much smoother with the additional 200 lbs of machine under me. The ergonomic design made it easy for me to keep going and going and going. Floor boards have a lot to do with biker comfort. The trusty Shadow has pegs. I’ve gotten to the point where for comfort I rest my ankles on my foot pegs with the heels of my boots 2″ from the highway [not recommended]. The handlebars on the Heritage were directly up in front of me and allowed me to rest my arms. The back seat was high enough and forward enough that it created lower lumbar support. The only thing that starts aching is the middle of my back, between my shoulder blades. Luckily Elise was back there and would massage the tension every few dozen miles. All-in-all, a very comfortable bike. I could easily see myself riding 100+ miles without having to stop and stretch. Maybe that’s just me… I get fidgetty even on long car rides.

And then there’s the pipes. I probably burned half of our fuel by the intermittent full throttling at red lights and in small town squares! That throaty thunder rumble at idle and the repetitive, gun shot muffler blast on acceleration. HA HA HA HA!!! !! Oh yes, one day I will own one! One day, El and I will take off and ride to Sturgis and Daytona (and we would actually ride – most rubs pull their bikes behind their $50k SUVs in a trailer). I want a custom chopper (solo seat), a big cruiser and a handful of sport bikes. Guess I need to start saving, eh?

Anyway, the Heritage Softail weighs in at over 700 lbs and the engine is almost twice as big as the trusty Shadow’s. Harley engines are measure in cubic inches. Most factory big twins are 88ci (1450 cubic centimeters). The Shadow is a 745cc cruiser. Needless to say, there was a HUGE difference is horsepower . And the torque! I didn’t tell El this, but many times I was was tempted to open the throttle, dump the clutch and pop a wheelie! I really didn’t want to try this for the first time on a rented scooter that I was liable for.

Motorcycle enthusiasts are really great people too. You’d be really surprised who you can meet and strike up a conversation with. As El noted, there is a definite camaraderie – and that goes beyond the wave. It’s just a club that you join when you own a bike. There are factions though. I find it hard to pull into a location occupied primarily by Harley Davidson motorcycles on the Shadow. I don’t care though, I like my bike. Anyway, back to the people. All walks of life are represented. A lot of them are ‘salt of the earth’ as El likes to call them. Some you know to stay away from, others are friendly and outgoing – just like every day social endeavors. A lot of people who drive those 4-wheeled vehicles with the holes in the dashboard that blow cold air like to stop and talk shop as well.

Riding a motorcycle is just plain cool. I think the classic word ‘cool’ was introduced into the English language with the motorcycle in mind. You see everything, you smell everything, you hear everything, you taste everything [when you yawn]. I like to think when I ride. You don’t have the distractions that come with a car – you’re not changing radio stations, talking on the phone, thumbing through books of CDs, playing air drums on the steering wheel, putting on make up, etc. You’ve got the wind and your wits.