Continue reading " Daddy’s Girl "

It’s pretty cool to turn on David Letterman and see the guy you grew up with playing bass guitar for Rob Zombie.

Continue reading " Matt plays on American Witch "

“You couldn’t get me the big bag of Twizzlers?”
“Are you serious?!?”
“I am couped up in this house, raising your daughter, completely shut off from the outside world and sometimes I feel like Twizzlers are the only thing that I have.”
“…”
“I’m serious.”

Continue reading " Very serious hormones "

I tested for my second degree black belt this past Saturday. For the past two months I had been extremely nervous about this test. All went well and surprisingly, I wasn’t half as nervous as I had anticipated.
The most difficult part was reciting, in Korean, the famous poem by Jeong Mong-ju.
Getting my second [...]

Continue reading " Second Degree "

In an effort to keep Maly from slicing her face open or scraping out an eyeball, I try to keep her fingernails trimmed down.
Last night she was fidgety and I was rushing as I thought of myself as a seasoned baby nail trimmer since I’ve performed this duty a whole two times previously.
Her entire body [...]

Continue reading " Call Child Protective Services "

Dear Maly,
You are now one month old. It’s almost impossible to believe that four weeks ago you became the oxygen-breathing miniature replica of me. Except for your tongue. That’s all from your mom.

One of my idiosyncrasies is that I have absolutely no short-term memory. However, I remember the day that you [...]

Continue reading " Monthly Maly Letter: Month one "

“I’m going to change Maly’s diaper. While I’m doing that, will you draw her a bath?”

Continue reading " Dad’s interpretation "

Actual conversation with the wine monger at the grand opening of the Escarpment Village HEB:
“Are you a dry white guy?”
“Nope. Just a plain ol’ honky.”

Continue reading " Uppity racism "

If your Grandma wasn’t there, we’d probably just let you drown while we talked about digital photography and video.
Your Dad lobbed the tip of your thumb while trying to clip your fingernails. And you bled. And you screamed. A lot.
Your Dad fell asleep on the couch with an open beer sitting on [...]

Continue reading " 33 Reasons Why We Should Be Award-Winning Parents "

Tool’s sixth album, 10,000 Days was released today and yours truly has been anxiously awaiting this day for months. I’d been keeping close tabs on album and tour date information and learned that the album was leaked two weeks ago. I made no plan to download the leaked album. Besides, I know [...]

Continue reading " 10,000 Days "