Continue reading " Every bride in central Texas will know the back of my head "

Here’s what you can do with your birthday balloons.

Continue reading " What you can do with your birthday balloons "

Your friends will wake you up and sing “Happy Birthday to you”
Photos are here.

Continue reading " Don’t conk out early on your 30th birthday party "

I turned 30 yesterday. I thought it was going to be just another day. The girls decorated the office with tons of black balloons and we ordered in Bella Serra for lunch. Later in the afternoon I stood up after burning a copy of MapPoint for my sales person and my right [...]

Continue reading " XXX "

Ever get that question, “So, what kind of music do you listen to?”
“Ummm… I pretty much like everything.”
No you don’t. I don’t like Kanye West. I don’t like Lenny Kravitz. I don’t like the Dick See Chicks.
Here’s my music signature.
($20 to anyone who can name at least 20 of the songs)

Continue reading " Music signature "

Very cool. A revolution! I’m looking forward to hearing the ad.
Lobby4Linux, in cooperation with myfirstlinux.com and featuring PclinuxOS; announce the first commercial advertising effort for the Linux Operating System. We will advertise a free system, not the boxed-sets for SUSE or RedHat you see on CompUSA shelves. The residents of Austin Texas will [...]

Continue reading " Austin Project "

“I’m going to sell my two motorcycle helmets. Do you want me to sell your’s?”
“No.”
“Why not?”
“…”
“Are you going to get drunk on your birthday again, put your motorcycle helmet on, sit in the hallway and cry while you show childhood photos to people that you don’t know?”
“You can sell it.”

Continue reading " How to sell your wife’s motorcycle helmet "

I FINALLY felt my kid kick tonight. For the past three weeks Elise would jump from the chair in the living room and over the coffee table to me on the couch and say, “HURRY! It’s moving!” I would put my hand on Elise’s stomach and wait.
And wait.
And wait more.
Nothing.
I finally felt [...]

Continue reading " Body moving. Body body body body body body body "

At 4 p.m. this afternoon I found Paul Teutul’s lifeless body resting flat on the rocks at the bottom of Tony Soprano’s tank.

I bought Paul Teutul, a gold guaramie, as a companion for Tony Soprano last week. Paul Teutul was introduced just over a month after Tony Soprano’s companion, Carmela tragically hanged herself.
Tony Soprano [...]

Continue reading " Paul Teutul found dead at bottom of famed mobster fish’s house "

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
I’m laughing all the way to my Ameritrade account. For a year or so. I’m hoping it’s longer than that.  Not because I’m a Mac guy.  I’m just not a big fan of Dell.

Continue reading " Bully on the monkey bars "