I punched Michael Bolton in the head

The talented Michael Bolton

This story is not one of my proudest moments. In fact, charges could have been pressed and I could have gone to a juvenile detention facility. I punched Michael Bolton on the top of his head. I have no idea why I suddenly remembered this incident. I suddenly experienced a flashback.

If memory serves me correctly, I was thirteen or fourteen years of age. I rode a short school bus to school. Not that kind of short bus. Bus #24 was Bellville Independent School District’s budgeted mode of transportation for those who lived in the Cat Spring area. There weren’t many of us on this bus seeing as how Cat Spring‘s population was approximately eight humans and two dogs.

On this particular Winter morning, yours truly was flu-stricken. I had the flu bad enough to where I should have stayed home that day. As I boarded the bus, Michael Bolton either said something or kicked me in the shin. I can’t remember the details, but whatever he did warranted my fist slamming into the top of his head.

Michael Bolton was the grandson of Norbert Bolton, our one-wrinkle-away-from-being-a-corpse bus driver. Michael Bolton was also quite younger than me. He was an annoying little twit. I shouldn’t have punched this little guy, but a combination of my health status, the fact that this kid is probably still getting pummeled to this day and the notion of punching someone named Michael Bolton, I just couldn’t help but let one loose on his noggin.

I got into trouble with the bus driver, I was “written up” by the school and I had my bus riding privileges revoked for a few weeks. Man, those were a rough few weeks. I got to sleep in because my mom now had to drive me to school. The commute to Bellville from Cat Spring in a standard vehicle is approximately 12 minutes. A commute on a dilapidated short bus driven by a walking, talking and breathing mummy who is built like a cowboy and is the grandfather of a child who shares the same name as a contemporary music [insert word] takes approximately an hour and seven minutes.

This incident didn’t leave me with anything valuable. I guess it’s just nice to be able to say that I’ve punched Michael Bolton. Now if I could just meet someone named Bob Saget.

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